Mrs. B

'The bells and whistles don't matter. It's the little things, tailored to genuine feelings of the individuals involved, that say, "I love you."'

I agree! My husband and I keep it simple, no gifts or flowers. How ridiculous that a dozen roses doubles in price for one day out of the year!


Best Valentine's Day gift? I used to date a guy who would give me history books. This showed a lot more thought about *me* than roses would, particularly as with the size of my library he had to be paying attention not to give me duplicates. :-)


Today I was reminded of one more reason why I love my husband. I talked to a client that I handled a divorce for. Her divorce was motivated by the revelation that her husband was molesting her daughter. The husband had also been brutally beating the wife for years. The husband was arrested for the molestation but never for the battery of his wife. The divorce proceeding occurred while his felony case was pending. At one point during mediation of the divorce case the husband said, in response to my argument that he should not be granted full custody of the children since he had repeatedly beat my client unconscious and had a felony child molestation case pending against him, "I beat her but I never molested that girl."

Aah. Love. He BEAT my client, sure, no big deal. But he was no child molester. (I am in no way saying that he is a child molestor or that men who beat their wives are or are not more likely to molest children). My point is that he said he beat his wife with such ease, such unconcern, such a complete lack of shame. Whatta guy.

And that is one more reason for me to love my husband on Valentine's day.

h sofia

I never much saw the fuss for Valentine's Day as I never had a Valentine for the day. My dad would always do something small like give my mom a card or take her to dinner. But they kept it pretty low key. This is my first year with a Valentine and he took me out of town for the weekend, and went a bit lavish (in my opinion). I worried about that at first, thinking it was too much, but at the same time it makes me feel very special because no one ever HAS done anything like this for me. He's the first person who ever gave me flowers. I always thought those things were pretty cheesy, but I guess when it's matched by true feeling it can also make one feel special.

But he and I both agree that diamonds are pretty gross. I think if he gave me a diamond (unless it was an antique or family heirloom), I would smack him upside the head for wasting so much money.

The Fat Lady Sings

Unfortunately, one of my friends tends to measure the viability of her relationships based upon what the man does for her on Valentines Day. Not how much he spends, mind; just how much effort he goes to. The problem is - even if whomever she's dating ignores the day completely, she will create some excuse allowing her to pretend he did. Like - she'll tell me he must have dropped by, or called or sent flowers when she was gone, or in the bathroom, or upstairs - anything to mask the truth. Yet if she’s dating someone who actually remembers Valentines Day – if that remembrance isn’t showy enough (mushy card, tenderly whispered I love you’s) - she’ll consider ending the relationship. I just don’t get it.


Just out of curiosity, to what lengths does SHE go?


I always figure that if your partner is treating you as you deserve the rest of the year, then Valentine's Day becomes less important. I mean, one overblown scripted romantic gesture a year is nothing if you don't have a healthy, enjoyable relationship for the other 365 days a year. Having said that, I am going for a weekend away with my bf this year, but it's just coincidence that it's after Valentine's Day!


Lovely. Its soooo exciting.....

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