All my life I have been very attracted to people of different backgrounds and different values than my own. There are few things more satisfying than a deep conversation with someone who views life through a different lens. The blogosphere seems to provide a unique opportunity for meaningful dialogue among all sorts of people. I don't know whether such dialogue accomplishes anything but, at the very least, it's awfully interesting.
For example, in my insular "blue state" world, I don't think I know anyone who believes that a wife has a duty of submission to her husband. Even if I met anyone who held such a belief, I would not want to put that person on the spot by asking nosy questions like, "How does that work in practice? Why do you think the wife always has to be the one to submit? Do you think it's fair for God to impose a hierarchy within marriage? How does it make you feel when you submit even when you'd rather not?" But in the blogosphere, willing parties who would never otherwise meet can have conversations about all sorts of sensitive topics. I love it!
As some of you know, I was inspired to start this blog because I found I had so much to say (and was possibly making myself slightly obnoxious) on Crystal's site on "Biblical Womanhood." I really enjoyed (and continue to enjoy) the give-and-take with the traditionalist readers of her blog. I'm thrilled that some of her readers (like Zan, and Mrs. B, and Erin) check in here and leave their comments. The challenge is that a lot of feminist readers check in here also, so I am writing for diverse readers who often have diametrically opposed views.
This has led me to worry about some problems related to diversity. Here are my introductory thoughts on some of these problems, although I could change my mind as things progress:
1) Whether to tailor my posts to one group or another: I am not going to change my opinions just to please my audience, but sometimes I might write with a view towards addressing the likely objections of the those with a traditionalist viewpoint. Some of those posts might strike those who agree with me as perhaps too obvious-- because after all, they already agree with me. Other times I might write a post (my posts about Judge Alito for example) directed at my fellow feminists without taking the traditionalist viewpoint into account.
2) Showing respect for my traditionalist readers and commenters while disagreeing vigorously with many of their beliefs: For example, I personally enjoy blogs that might appear to be disrespectful of conservative Christianity -- although I would argue that the blogs I am thinking of are lampooning not Christianity itself but rather the politicized Religious Right's efforts to impose their views on others. Amanda at Pandagon is a master at using humor to expose the absurdities of the Religious Right in the political realm. I have decided to link to those blogs even though my more conservative readers might interpret them as insulting or disrespectful. I have chosen not to use that sort of humor here, because I am not always preaching to the choir and I am trying to create a place where everyone can be comfortable. At the same time I don't want to soften my honest and strongly held beliefs just because they may seem unpalatable to some of my readers! It's a balance. My role model on this is Hugo Schwyzer who -- perhaps because he is a male, evangelical Christian feminist -- has managed to create quite a diverse community of commenters on his blog.
3) Whether I have a duty to intervene if commenters are showing disrespect for each other: I prefer not to delete comments or intervene, although obviously I have the discretion to do so. These are just words after all and I think all my readers are adults who can take care of themselves. Furthermore, I am happy to report that the tone of discourse on this blog so far has been intelligent and mostly respectful -- a true "give and take," like this thread.
I guess I want you all to know that I'm thinking about these things and I'm new to this and I'm doing my best. If any of you have any particular concerns or questions, or if you have seen something on here that has made you feel uncomfortable or unwanted, feel free to email me at veryhappyfeminist@yahoo.com. Obviously, it's my blog and I can do whatever I want, but that doesn't mean I'm not open to suggestions!
i think that's the beauty in blogging. you do get to write whatever it is you want to write about. readers come back because it is something that interests them, whether or not they always agree with it. i say keep blogging about things you care about, and let the chips fall where they may!
Happy Thanksgiving...
Posted by: aisy | November 24, 2005 at 12:54 AM
I wrote about the whole obeying thing a while ago...here's the link if you'd like a look: http://incapability.blogspot.com/2005/08/choosing-to-obey.html
Dr Crazy always tells people off when they're rude to each other in comments, and I've warned one or two. Think its best not to let any scraps happen: people might not want to comment if they're getting verbally lynched! And as for deleting: I recently had a problem commenter, but I just left it up.
Anyway, happy blogging!
Posted by: Clare | November 24, 2005 at 06:44 AM
Happy, you've been at this longer than I have, but what I have learned is to create a blog (if you REALLY want people to read it) which has a niche and then a unique flavor within that niche. You seem to have done that quite nicely.
Posted by: Haida | November 24, 2005 at 04:19 PM
"people might not want to comment if they're getting verbally lynched!"
This is very true and is why I hadn't commented in the past but Zan writes some very bold things and noone's 'verbally lynched' her, so I've been commenting more lately.
HF: Rarely do I agree with you but I enjoy reading what you say because you have a very pleasant writing style and because you don't write about issues in a mocking way. To be honest, if you did, I probably wouldn't come back to your blog.....of course, like you said, it's yours and you have EVERY right to write whatever you choose to, just my 2 cents.
Posted by: Mrs. B | November 27, 2005 at 05:58 PM
I think a blog is very similar to a retail product. You need to decide what audience you want to attract and gear it towards that. My husband and I have just recently set up a blog and we've determined that it will have infrequent but in-depth postings, predominantly politically and socially oriented. It is our hope that it will attract similar-minded people. But in the end, it is YOUR blog. You must do what it takes to make YOU feel satisfied and proud of it. From a personal standpoint, even though I am at least 15 years older than you, I find your viewpoints similar to mine, and your approach (pretty damn rational!) similar to mine. So...blog away...I'm thoroughly enjoying your site! (and it makes me feel so damn good that this middle-age product of the 1970's feminist movement isn't out here all alone - the next generation is strong and vocal - it hasn't been all for nothing).
Posted by: the pirate's wife | November 28, 2005 at 12:51 AM
But before redesigning technology around the quirks of our maddening gender stereotyping, I'd rather fight the idea that women can only be beautiful and therefore worth something (not to mention visible) if they wear highly uncomfortable clothing designed to cripple them, and have to live their lives in a rigid posture not to spoil their hair do and make up.
Posted by: iphone zubehoer | January 01, 2010 at 06:35 AM